what is a landfill?

i woke up this morning trying to figure out what a landfill is. in general conference, elder somebody just provided the webster's dictionary definition of 'landfill.' apparent it is defined as:

A method of solid waste disposal in which refuse is buried between layers of dirt so as to fill in or reclaim low-lying ground.

thanks elder somebody. i would have been totally confused without you providing a definition.

proposed sunstone panel

i was talking with a co-worker today about the various lives of lds students here in happy valley and decided that i want to propose a panel for next year's sunstone symposium - something like 'experiences of lds students in happy valley.' i would get a handful of various students to share their varying experiences here.

perhaps it could look like this:

inactive/former lds (jason king?)
someone like me (steve m.?)
token female (kelly?)
conservative guy (connor?)
crazy insane conservative guy (hhhhh?)
wookie (chewy?)

anyways, it's just a thought. i think it'd be fun and interesting though.

kristen nielsen anderson's windmill (slightly updated)

this morning, a letter to the editor in uvsc's college times by kristen neilson anderson was printed. it was - let's just say - really really really not good (i'm trying to be cordial).

the letter can be read here.

this is my reply:

In the September 25^th edition of the College Times, Kristen Nielsen Anderson continues her father’s crusade to defend the impressionable and naïve students of this school from what she calls “a recent liberal assault on balanced academic freedom at UVSC.” While I am sure Anderson is well-meaning, her argument is grounded on a gross (and seemingly intentional) misunderstanding of the issue.

Throughout Anderson’s letter, she repeatedly refers to a “diversity course” that some are hoping to establish at UVSC. She claims that this is some new class that ‘liberals’ at UVSC are trying to force on students, going as far as making the stupefying claim that the term ‘diversity course’ “is widely perceived as a code term for liberal agenda.” Anderson’s confusion continues in her claim that Bill Evenson and others are “asking UVSC's board to force students who want to graduate to take the course before the content of the course is revealed!”

So what is this “diversity course” that Ms. Anderson is repeatedly fighting against? Are school administrators covertly trying to push their so-called liberal agenda through a new class? If Anderson would have taken a few minutes to actually look into this issue, she would have quickly discovered that this “diversity course” is nothing but a bogeyman of her own imagination. Like Don Quixote’s attack on fierce giants, Anderson’s “diversity course” is simply a windmill of rumor and her own delusion.

Anderson repeatedly cites an August 13^th Deseret News article in her letter, but one wonders how much of this article she has actually read. There is no discussion of her personal chimera, the dreaded ‘diversity course.’ Rather, there is repeated mention of a “global/intercultural understanding requirement” composed of already existing courses. In fact, the article says that students “could choose among a list of about 25 courses to fulfill the requirement.” That’s right, one of 25 already existing courses. The article further explains that these classes range from “an introduction anthropology course to world dance to an upper division English course called Literature of the Sacred, about world religions.” Unlike the mythical “diversity course” that Anderson seems to fight, the diversity requirement is nothing but a tightened-down version of our humanities requirement that focuses on courses that help students enhance their cultural awareness.

Unfortunately, Anderson’s confusion does not end there. In her letter, Ms. Anderson misleadingly quotes Bill Evenson, replacing his plural “courses” with her mythic singular “course.” She then falsely accuses Evenson of “asking UVSC's board to force students who want to graduate to take the course before the content of the course is revealed!” This is a dishonest misrepresentation of what was said in the article. The article actually reads: “The requirement needs to be approved before courses can be developed.” Anderson turns the simple fact that a list of courses cannot be made until a guideline is established, into a blatantly libelous and false accusation against Evenson.

Finally, Ms. Anderson uses her misconceptions as a platform to attack the Philosophy Department and the Center for the Study of Ethics at UVSC, neither of which is behind the proposed intercultural requirement. Though these accusations are also unfounded, they reveal a deeper problem that underlies not only Anderson’s confusions, but much of the persistent conservative/liberal debates here on campus. If Anderson had attempted some research into the intercultural requirement or had even bothered to ask those involved, much of her ill-conceived frustrations could have been avoided. Too much fighting and arguing occurs because people are first to accuse and last to ask questions. This is true for both sides of the debate (and probably true for my letter as well). Too often we want to hold up certain stereotypes of the other and assume the worst before considering the better. As an LDS student at UVSC, I see this on a nearly daily basis. I see some holding and criticizing a naïve view of those of my faith. At the same time, I witness those in my religious community showing disregard for and having suspicion of those outside the community.

Furthermore, as a Latter-day Saint, I believe that understanding and inclusiveness are foundational aspects of Christ’s message and key to a lasting and peaceful society. The greatest part of being a missionary for my faith was the opportunity to spend two years immersed in a culture far different from the one I experienced in Utah. It helped me appreciate lifestyles and perspectives different from my own. That is the very thing that the intercultural requirement seeks to achieve. Some may call inclusiveness and cultural understanding a “liberal agenda.” I choose to call it loving my neighbor.

it still needs some work and revision, but i hope to have in printed in monday's issue.

unsustain'd

connor promised that there would not be any censorship on sustain'd unless it was blatantly anti-mormon or offensive, and said that the vitality of the post would solely depend on its 'sustainabliltiy' on the site.

well... i just found this on the top of the site today:

Note: You can now bury a post if you think it shouldn't be here. One bury per person, and three buries removes the article from Sustain'd.

i can't help but see this as a response to several posts bryant, steve m., and i have submitted to sustain'd today. now if three people decided that they don't like your post it is banished for good - censorship at it's best.

and to think that this all arose from mormonstories.org being banned from a blog aggregate for a single post.

sustain'd

one time i threw up and there was a quarter in it.

on a side note, my sometimes arch-nemesis connor has launched a new site to showcase lds blog posts. sustain'd works like digg.com where it allows people to vote on blog posts to raise it's popularity.

so here is where you come in. i want to test this thing out to see if a strong critical/progessive voice can be made from the lds community. register for sustain'd and find some of the best controversial posts you can find and submit them so you and others can sustain them. try to submit blog posts that are not your own. and be sure to 'sustain' blog posts that others have submitted.

what if god is a tyrant?

what if president bush were an evil tyrant? (this is all hypothetical of course). what if bush required us meet once a week and praise and learn about him? what if we were required to call him and leave voice-mails three or more times a day thanking him for our freedom and the land we live in? what if we were required to read his biography every night? what if we had to dress in a way that he told us to? what if we had a weekly bush-day where we were required to not engage in our regular activities and instead had to think about him all day? what if we were required to eat bush-crackers to help us remember him? what if we had to swear loyalty to him through a ritual of crossing a path draped in an american flag? what if we had to arbitrarily believe that he was the greatest president ever? what if failure to do all of these things resulted in being kicked out of the nation to live a solitary life of misery - despite all of the good you provided for the county?

most of us would revolt. we would decry this tyranny. we would think bush were an evil tyrant and undeserving of our devotion. yet this is the way that most of mormonism and much of christianity envisions god. and they call it good.

it is for these very reasons that i reject a tyrannical model of god and either reject/refine the various ways with which god becomes a tyrant. i want to believe that god is a loving being - the most loving being. i want to believe that god is primarily and ultimately concerned in the ways that god's children interact and treat one another. i want to believe that god is self-less and unconcerned with praise, admiration, and devotion. i want to believe that god is concerned with our hearts and not with the propositional beliefs that we hold or our proclamations of 'faith' which seem to be arbitrarily dispersed among god's children. i want to believe that god is not a tyrant.

but what if?? what if god is a tyrant. what if god is an all-powerful being concerned with his praise and devotion. what if god will see that one of his children suffers for not holding a proper belief about him? what if god really does elevate/damn his children contigently upon whether or not they go through a ritual denoting devotion to him, in this life or the next? what if our lives are subject to the power of a tyrant who can and will destroy us because of a lack of devotion and ritualistic praise of him - despite all we try to do for his children?

i be cursed

i'm not sure if this is serious or not, but apparently some nut has been inspired be god to place a curse on me.

By the Spirit, I could see into the heart of this man. Woe, Woe unto those who possess the same spirit as the Narrator, and if you do, then this curse will be for you.

you can read the full curse here.

i don't know if i should feel endangered or honored.

big brother is watching (for steve m.)

i made this image to go along with a comment i left on steve m.'s within the bubble. unfortunately i don't think blogger allows images on comments.

here is my comment:

Steve:- Have a picture of Christ as a desktop background.

How can anyone say that that is not Big Brother? Further proof that people use Del Parson's image of Christ to keep them from masterbating/looking at porn/fornication/other sins because it gives them the feeling that they are being watched.

I had a roommate who actually had a picture of Jesus with a small book light on it to try to prevent his girlfriend and him from sexing it up.

BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU.

i am awesome

this will only make sense on provoplatinum.com

(posted by the narrator, allowing 927 comments)

hhhhhhhhhh. leave your comments here. (updated a 3rd time!)

a fellow that goes by the name of hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh has decided to hijack a post at bloggerofjared.com to launch a tirade of accusations against me. you can see where it starts here. in order to free up bloggerjared.com, i am offering hhhhhhhh free space to lay out and document whatever he wants to say about me.

oh hell, you can all join in and piss on me if you want.

enjoy!

----------------------------------
*update*

apparently i am not even allowed to post a comment on bloggerofjared.com to redirect attacks on me. i tried to invite hhhhhhhhh to move his personal criticisms of me here, but my short invite fell to the scissors of censorship.

*update#2*

after someone else complained, most of hhhhhh's attacks on me have been deleted from bloggerofjared. this post is quickly losing any context.

*update#3*

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh has been gracious enough to grace my blog with his comments. he reminds me of a chihuahua sticking his head out of the purse of some rich old lady and barking with a high-pitched yelp.

sister helen prejean

i can be such a wuss.

I go back to the visitor door. The guard inside is putting the shackles on Pat's hands and feet inside the cell. He opens the cell door and Pat comes over to the metal folding chair by the door. As he approaches the chair his legs sag and he drops to one knee beside the chair. He looks at me. "Sister Helen, I'm going to die."

----

I look at my watch and Pat looks at his. It is 10:30. Everything is ready now. All Pat needs to do now is die. He asks the guard for a pen and writes in his Bible, up in front, where there is a special place for family history - births, marriages, deaths.
"There," he says, "I wrote it in my own hand."
The guard unlocks teh door and hands me the Bible. I look at the front page. He has written loving words to me, words of thanks. Then I see under "Deaths" his name and the date, April 4, 1984.
I remember Jesus' words that we do not know the day nor the hour. But Pat knows. And in knowing he dies and then dies again.

it's 1 a.m. i'm lying in bed. reading. bawling my eyes out.

i've written about capital punishment before. here, here, here, here, here, and here, so i'm not going to go into another tirade yet. this is just a short announcement that sister helen prejean, author of dead man walking and the death of innocents, will be speaking at uvsc next week as part of the second annual utah valley state death penalty symposium. for those interested she will be giving the keynote address on tuesday, september 19th at 4pm in the regan theatre.

9/11 - lessons ignored

This great evil. Where does it come from? How'd it steal into the world? What seed, what root did it grow from? Who's doin' this? Who's killin' us? Robbing us of life and light. Mockin' us with the sight of what we might've known. Does our ruin benefit the earth? Does it help the grass to grow, the sun to shine? Is this darkness in you, too? Have you passed to this night?
- the thin red line

five years have passed since the towers have collapsed and still we have not learned one of the greatest lessons from this tragic event. we still do not comprehend and acknowledge the lesson of 9/11 and all of history that evil begets evil. we want to point out the evil, but don't want to ask where it came from.

on one end of the spectrum is president bush and his neo-con cronies. though they constantly cry out against terrorism, they ignore the roots of it's evil with an idea of evil ex nihilo. they pretend the evil had no cause, exists on its own, and repay it with more terrorism. two wrongs don't make a right, they make a third wrong. by repaying evil with evil more evil ensues.

on the other end of the spectrum is steven jones and other conspiratorial kooks. instead of acknowledging the terrorsim, but ignoring the root of it's evil, the conspiratorial kooks pretend the terrorism wasn't real and ignore a lesson that needs to be learned.

evil didn't just happen. terrorists just don't create themselves. unless we learn to value evil for what it is and where it grows, it will just continue to perpetuate itself.

9/11 - lessons forgotten

a few days after 9/11 my friend mike and i went to the uvsc lds institute building to donate blood. the lines to donate stretched through the halls as everyone and their dog got up to do some good. the red cross saw it's supplised overfilled. this morning the red cross called me to donate blood. most people who donated following 9/11 have not donated since then.

9/11 seemed to bring out the best in so many people. everyone seemed to be giving. congress held hands and sang together. strangers openly embraced. others reconciled their differences and renewed their friendships. through the terror, people found a sense of community reflecting a love for others.

those days have since long passed. inherent evils and desire to rise above the other have overtaken the communal unity. war replaced peace abroad and has stirred war within the nation. congress only holds hands to secure incumbency and pay.

when i go to donate blood this week, the red cross will again tell me that their supplies are low. they foresaw the rise of giving love falling to the apathy of common humanity and inconvenience winning over charity. the lessons of love that overcame our nation for a few weeks have been long forgotten.

9/11 - lessons learned

5 years ago this morning i stepped into my car and started off towards saratoga springs to paint a house. i rarely listen to the radio anymore, but as i started my car up i quickly realized that there was no cd in my stereo and thought i'd give x96 a start to my day. a few minutes after i had gotten into my car kerry, bill, and gina of radio from hell announced that a plane had hit one of the world trade center towers. at that time reports were that it had been a small personal jet. several minutes later they announced that another plane had hit the towers...

instead of prepping a newly constructing house before it was to be painting, my friend and i sat alongside the curb outside the house and listened to the developing story as it fed out of my car's radio. within a few hours two towers had collapsed, the pentagon was in flames, and a plane had collided into a pennsylvanian field. in this and later days, i learned about how evil we can be.

i already new about the evils of terrorism. nothing was new there. nothing learned. this was the same old story, just brought on our own land. while not always this extreme, terrorist attacks were a daily part of life for many across the globe. as sickening and disheartening as this was, i thrived off of it, and this was the first lesson of evil i learned from that day.

Cause I need to watch things die... from a distance. Vicariously I live while the whole world dies. You all need it too, don't lie. - tool

i have already written a little bit about this before. when the planes and towers began to fall from the sky, i wanted more. i was waiting for and wanting more destruction. i wanted more planes to crash into buildings. i wanted bombs to explode. i wanted people to die... just as long as it wasn't me or those i care for. when the official death tally was released, i was disappointed. two thousand something? they were telling me it was going to be in the tens of thousands! i wanted my money back. i paid for more with my expectations and deserved a refund.

this is what i had to say a year ago:

rewind four years to september 11th 2001. admit it. you know what i am talking about. the pentagon is still smoking. the two towers are a crumbled mess. you were waiting. not just waiting. deep down you were hoping for something else. another plane to crash. a building to blow up. another terrorist attack. you listened to the radio in search for more excitement. you turned to the news for info on the next hundred or so dead people. admit it, the higher number of deaths, the more exciting your life had become.

the very same story can be told with different instances of death and destruction. a year ago when katrina flooded the homes and streets of new orleans, the news was reporting possible deaths in the tens or even hundreds of thousands. it ended up being less than two thousand. again, we had been gypped. the asian tsunami promised exponentially more deaths by disease and famine. again, gypped.

i know i'm not the only one. i'm pretty sure you felt the same. the rising death counts, the possibility for imminent destruction gave us something exciting to talk about with friends and co-workers. it gave us life.

i don't know why we feel this way. perhaps it's a part of our inherent biological instincts for survival. perhaps it is a result of the media's portrayal and glorification of violence and destruction. whichever it is, there is a cruel sense of evil within each of us that thrives on the destruction of others.

Why can't we just admit it? Why can't we just admit it?...You all feel the same, so Why can't we just admit it?

---

another evil that quickly arose were those willing to use the atrocities of 9/11 to manipulate, con, and profit from others. within days, news reports discussed con artists who set up fake foundations to profit from those who had died. others attempted to directly profit from the dead through insurance scams and stolen identities. within those same days, another group of con artists utilized the fear and mourning of 9/11 to initiate an illegal attack on iraq.

over the months, the atrocities of 9/11 became ever profitable. capitalizing from the fear of terrorism (and the previously mentioned love of death), media reports repeatedly shown and advertized new video of the attacks. protection from terrorists became marketable in useless supplies of various safety devices. fear was manipulated by the government with a terror gauge that rose when presidential support was needed. fear was further manipulated to push governmental intrusions of privacy. movies, videos, books, and commercials all utilized the deaths of 9/11 victims to increase profits.

9/11 didn't just reveal the evils of terrorism. even more, it made public the evil inherent in all of us.

i think i just threw up in my mouth

i can be mean at times, and sometimes i just can't help myself. every now and then i come across a blog that is just so ultra-conservative, so utterly void of rationality, (and may i say so evil) that i can't leave it alone. like a terrible itch, i have to keep scratching, and scratching, and scratching at it... only to find the itch strengthen and grow.

meet connor