Here's my one and only tie to Bob Bennett. I wrote it for a buddy who worked for him when I was working in Congress. You'll probably hate it, but hey, there's always censorship...
‘Twas the day before recess, when all through the Dirksen All the LA’s were stressing and the LC’s were irksome; The Omnibus was lingering amid doubts and despair, And dreams of vacations had vanished in the air; When out on the floor there arose such a clatter, I flipped the TV to CSPAN to see what was the matter, When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, The very event that everyone feared. The bill had been stalled by lying and fibs, I knew in a moment it must be the libs. More rapid than eagles the pork projects came, From the lame duck dems, we’ll call them by name; Out Dashle! Out Edwards! Out Bob Graham and Hollings! Wake up you losers, America’s calling! From the North to the South, from the red AND the blue! All Dashle’d away, Dashle’d away, Dashle’d away! Phew! But then, in a twinkling, I heard from the floor. The Democrats whining hush to a dull roar. For once there was a silence from the left of the Senate, As down the center aisle strutted Bob Bennett. An old cowboy hat he had flung on his head, And he looked just like Clint Eastwood, the gallery said. His head – how it sparkled! His dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his ears, kind of hairy. With his droll little mouth he called out those libs, To quit with the stalling, the whining, the fibs. And when he had finished he clenched tight his teeth, And I swear a halo circled his head like a wreath; The Dems were all shaking like Teddy Kennedy’s belly, And Hillary’s face was red as a bowlful of jelly. But a wink of his eye and a twist of his head, Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread; They spoke not a word, but went straight to their bill, And for the first time this year, there was work on the Hill, And laying his hat back on top of his dome, He gave a quick nod and turned to go home. But I heard him exclaim, ere he walked out of sight, “Merry Christmas to all, and have a nice flight.”
Um...are you mormon, or not? Let's think about it. Hope you get into the BYU seminar! Also...I do have to agree with you about the BYUI kids. Holier-than-thou types. But honestly, read what you're doing.
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Do they threaten you? Are they rivals with the i-think-i'm-so-cool-UVSC-mormon-left clique? Or is that less of a clique and more of a renegade group?
ReplyDeleteI didn't know there was such a group at Rexburg, but I definitely hate Bob Bennet. How could he say such a thing about Barry Manilow?
ReplyDeleteIs that really it? I was hoping for so much more. Not that I need help fueling my dislike for either of the above-mentioned parties, but still...
ReplyDeleteHere's my one and only tie to Bob Bennett. I wrote it for a buddy who worked for him when I was working in Congress. You'll probably hate it, but hey, there's always censorship...
ReplyDelete‘Twas the day before recess, when all through the Dirksen
All the LA’s were stressing and the LC’s were irksome;
The Omnibus was lingering amid doubts and despair,
And dreams of vacations had vanished in the air;
When out on the floor there arose such a clatter,
I flipped the TV to CSPAN to see what was the matter,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
The very event that everyone feared.
The bill had been stalled by lying and fibs,
I knew in a moment it must be the libs.
More rapid than eagles the pork projects came,
From the lame duck dems, we’ll call them by name;
Out Dashle! Out Edwards! Out Bob Graham and Hollings!
Wake up you losers, America’s calling!
From the North to the South, from the red AND the blue!
All Dashle’d away, Dashle’d away, Dashle’d away! Phew!
But then, in a twinkling, I heard from the floor.
The Democrats whining hush to a dull roar.
For once there was a silence from the left of the Senate,
As down the center aisle strutted Bob Bennett.
An old cowboy hat he had flung on his head,
And he looked just like Clint Eastwood, the gallery said.
His head – how it sparkled! His dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his ears, kind of hairy.
With his droll little mouth he called out those libs,
To quit with the stalling, the whining, the fibs.
And when he had finished he clenched tight his teeth,
And I swear a halo circled his head like a wreath;
The Dems were all shaking like Teddy Kennedy’s belly,
And Hillary’s face was red as a bowlful of jelly.
But a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
They spoke not a word, but went straight to their bill,
And for the first time this year, there was work on the Hill,
And laying his hat back on top of his dome,
He gave a quick nod and turned to go home.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he walked out of sight,
“Merry Christmas to all, and have a nice flight.”
you don't even know how happy this makes me.
ReplyDeleteisn't 'HATE' a little strong of a word? I don't think you hate, maybe dislike or are disappointed, but HATE?
ReplyDeleteHate is like wanting to kill and hurt and kick...i think you really mean "think he is dumb". don't you?
Um...are you mormon, or not? Let's think about it. Hope you get into the BYU seminar! Also...I do have to agree with you about the BYUI kids. Holier-than-thou types. But honestly, read what you're doing.
ReplyDeletewhat am i doing?
ReplyDelete