patriarchal blessing

i was laying in bed trying to sleep and noticed a folded piece of paper right above my head. it was my patriarchal blessing. haven't read it for a while. haven't wanted to read it for a while. refused to read it for a while. i figured i might as well read it tonight.

my grandpa gave me my patriarchal blessing. growing up, i didn't want to get my blessing from him. i just thought he was a mean, stubborn, old man. i was right. however, as i got older i learned that there was more to him. he is also well read, insightful, loving (in his grumpy old man sort of way), experienced, and a man who really tries to do what he feels is right - no matter what others may say or think. i gained much respect for him and, right before my mission, asked him to give me my blessing.

as i read it tonight, i was amazed at how relevant it seems to me right now. sure, i sometimes feel the same way with my weekly horoscope. make things vague enough and they'll always tend to fit. however, this seemed to ring even truer to me. my current struggles and my searching seemed to be the theme of it all. search for truth. search for truths. truths. truths. knowledge. understanding. study. true. search. truths. thoughts. search. it seemed to emphasize the process of searching and not the actual attaining. something i need to continue and not quit. there were some other things too. things i'd rather not write about, but things i perhaps needed to hear (or read i guess).

my grandpa knew me pretty well. he knew the kind of person i was growing up. horoscopes can be crafted in such a way to make them seem pertinant to us personally. there could be plenty of explanations. we often hear and see what we want to hear and see.

or maybe like my last post, the answer is simple. so simple that i have a hard time grasping it. too simple to just accept. too simple to intellectually understand.